Go ahead and cry….but don’t quit.

There are only a few things that will cause me to cry. If you hurt my feelings, I cry. If I am over trained, I might burst into a spontaneous, uncontrollable sob.

This happened once after a long run. I threw myself on the floor face down and cried miserably. My husband kept saying, “Just quit! You don’t have to do this.” There was no way I was going to quit but I needed a good cry that day.

Crying serves an emotional purpose, a release. There is a buildup of energy with feelings. It’s usually a signal you need to address something….you’re frustrated or overwhelmed.

I worked for a company that made computerized telephone systems. At that time long, long ago, it was the newest technology. As a Technical Instructor, I taught a class of all men for 5 weeks at a time. Not all bad actually until one of them didn’t pass the class.

One student I remember in particular was devastated that he hadn’t passed. He was embarrassed and angry with himself….and he cried.

This was how I felt a couple of weeks ago after Kung Fu. It seemed I was getting nowhere with my lessons. For all the effort in the world, I didn’t feel like a warrior – which I wanted so desperately to become.

I cried all the way home and decided maybe it was time for me to quit.

A few days later I found myself telling a friend about my dilemma. Out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of my husband’s face. I knew immediately. He didn’t think I was trying hard enough.

For a few days I vacillated between being mad at him and mad with myself. For another few days I felt sorry for myself. Then, finally, I decided he might be right.

I must be willing to give up what I am in order to become what I will be.

Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

I wasn’t going to write about this – but then decided there might be others struggling to stick with something. Maybe it helps to know we all go through it from time to time.

Running comes easy for me but not everything in life does. This makes the reward even sweeter when you finally get to where you want to be.

Allow yourself a good cry, but don’t quit.

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2 thoughts on “Go ahead and cry….but don’t quit.

  1. Marcia, I read your post several days ago and have been mulling it over. I am glad that you decided to cry and not quit – an advantage you gals have over us guys some times (OK, maybe the occasional sapping movie a little). I can tell from you words and observed actions, that you thoroughly enjoy your martial arts. I don’t think that you risk my fate (yet) of becoming a martial artist who runs instead of a runner who does martial arts, but I am glad you are sticking with it. A week ago, I was suffering some of the same feelings over my running, depressed at not making the miles to run a local 15K. At your encouragement and others, I did the 5K instead and was rewarded with 2nd in my age group – and yes there were more than 2 runners between 60 and 64, actually a pretty good group. My poor training for a 15K had been good enough for the 5K (although I realize all the fast old guys had done the long run). This brings up a message on training that I wanted to share from another blog. My Ryukyu Kempo instructor also has a blog on solo training. He owns an art studio and recently reviewed a book entitled “The War of Art” (a takeoff on the classic “The Art of War” by Sun Tzu). Sensei / Art dealer Adam quoted from the book about the “immense benefit of creating a regular routine and applying ones self without regard to the outcome” and “Resistance…as the’ central obstacle to accomplishing goals”. “The War of Art” author, Steven Pressfield uses as his prayer, “The Invocation of the Muse” from Homer’s Odyssey, translation by T.E.Lawrence. I am adopting this prayer of “for this day, this session, I have overcome resistance”.

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    1. Thanks so much for your support. I am so proud of your race. Congratulations. And thanks for the words of wisdom – they are sorely needed from time to time. I’ve read the Art of War, believe it or not, and it sounds like I should take a look at The War of Art as well! Thanks always.

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